I have been brought up in a Christian household, although my two older brothers don’t believe in God. I had always attended church and learnt all the facts that everyone knows, but it never truly registered in my heart the same way it did in my head.
I attended Soul Survivor numerous times, and each time was a new experience where I felt that God was trying to teach me that I need to hand over my pain and anger to him rather than bottle it up. I gave my life to God the first time I went to Soul Survivor in 2012 and went on to be Baptised later on the 1st December 2013 after many promptings from the Lord.
During the year leading up to my baptism I felt my faith was definitely tested through obtaining numerous injuries. The most challenging of them was when I broke my finger, which has led to three operations, in three different hospitals by three different doctors, yet I am still unable to bend it. Through this ongoing experience, I am learning to be patient and to trust in God’s timing and plan as well as to be persistent in prayer. However, at the beginning of the year, I felt really far from God to the point where I felt unable to read my Bible, pray or sing, which was a pretty scary experience. I wrestled with this for months and felt very overwhelmed as I was trying to find God in amongst worrying about my AS levels, my finger injury and finding myself.
By the time Soul Survivor 2015 came around, I couldn’t escape these negative words in my head but with the prayer and support of my friends I managed to gain some hope that I could use the week to reach out to God. By the end of the week, I realised that all the talks I had been to were directing me towards the knowledge that although my faith had been shaken, it was not broken and that I could be restored in my faith. I received a lot of prayer over the week and even though I had no massive epiphany, I felt several phrases were rooted in my heart, which have allowed me to sing, pray and read the Bible again. My faith is by no means perfect, but it is building and I am learning to trust in His plan with the knowledge that He is always by my side.